The gospel in the trenches

In case you haven't seen our family lately, with 4 wild boys running circles around us and one sweet girl stealing all of our affections, we are in the trenches. The trenches of parenting. Five kids under 8 years old. It is not easy. And then add a little homeschooling to the mix, meaning we're together all. the. time. Our days are full, and they are blessed :)

This parenting thing is hard. There is so much to learn. We recently went to a Christian homeschool conference. It was a much needed dose of encouragement, but it was also very challenging and somewhat convicting. The Lord really seems to be impressing upon my heart this idea of 'living the gospel' in our home. What does that look like? What does that even mean?

We of course want our children to know God above all else that we will ever teach them. To know his goodness, his mercy, his love. To be steeped in the truth of His word, and armed for the spiritual battle that awaits them in this world. But how do we teach them day in and day out that it all boils down to the gospel, that everything points to Jesus and what he has done for us.

The gospel is the simple truth that we are all wretched sinners and yet we all have access to an amazing and perfect Savior, simply because of His love for us. It is the ultimate good news. I always learned it growing up as grace, our completely free gift from God, that we did nothing and will never do anything to earn.

What I think the Lord is teaching me now is to go deeper into the freedom the gospel brings. The freedom to love. Without condition. To let go of the expectations I place on myself, or those around me. To trust in the completeness of the gospel.

When my kids argue constantly, or they are disrespectful, when they hit or scream or grab or kick, when they ignore or willfully disobey what I've asked them to do. How do I show them the gospel then? How do I love them then? What about when my selfishness creeps in? When I'd rather have a clean house or a good-looking family on the outside, than truly look at what is going on in hearts on the inside? These are the real moments. The ones I live out all the time, every single day.

I don't yet know exactly what 'living the gospel' in our home means. I desperately want to keep learning, though. I think much of it comes down to love. And grace. Keeping calm more, flying off the handle a lot less. Freedom to believe that Jesus' sacrifice truly is enough to cover over everything. My wretched sin, my husband's, that of my kids. Everybody. Reminding myself of that in each moment, every day. Trusting His sacrifice on the cross to be enough.

I want to love Jesus with reckless abandon, and because I am humbled that he would save a sinner like me, seek to love and serve those around me like that too. Living the gospel.

"God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8