Why strongholds?

I have been pondering this question lately...perhaps caught up in my own defeatedness at times, and other times discouraged by "the world" in general. I mean, why doesn't the Lord just zap us into at least a semi-state of perfection once we see and admit our desperate need for Him?! Why does he allow us to struggle so against the tactics of the enemy? Why does he allow us to still wrestle greatly with our flesh, even after His Spirit dwells within?

The answer is obvious in Scripture. Obvious, yet requiring of constant reminder to my wayward heart.

"...this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead." 2 Cor. 1:9

"That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses...in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Cor. 12:10

"No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it." Heb. 12:11

"For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows." 2 Cor. 1:5

I know that God doesn't perfect us here on this earth for a divine reason. He is so purposeful. He doesn't give us easy formulas or "how to's" for marriage or parenting or even just right living. But He gives us something better...His Holy Word. Living Water. He allows us to struggle, so that we draw nearer to Him, so that we know that we know that we just cannot do this thing without Him. So that we know (and live like) He is our life and breath.

Recently I heard Beth Moore describe our earthly "promised land" as characterized by 2 things: 1) living in consistent Victory (not sinless, not even always happy, but consistently claiming the Victory that Christ died to give us in daily moments of life), and 2) bearing fruit (living in our calling, being impactful for Christ in the sphere of influence He has put us in).

That really struck me. I realized that I was allowing myself to be brought down by my strongholds and let them enter me into a cycle of defeat over and over again. I was not living in my promised land. And that is not where God wants me to be. No matter what circumstance comes my way in this life, no matter how many times a day I think I can't do this, He is the Victory. He has already overcome. It is finished. I came back from hearing that with a renewed heart and steadfast spirit.

I am called to spend my days raising these wild, crazy boys. To allow Him to love them through me. To point them to the Cross every chance I have. To honor Him in my struggles and in my hardships. To cling to Grace as the very air I breathe.

May I hold fast to the One who makes this even remotely possible! May I rejoice in my strongholds and struggles, as He brings me from glory to glory. His grace truly is sufficient...His power made perfect in weakness.

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I was led to this very wise blog post today for a reason...and so I'm linking this post there.

The hard thankfuls

I've been reminded a lot lately, and urged in my spirit, to give thanks in the hard things. It is somewhat easy to make a gratitude list of all the good things.

feeling little baby kicks
grandparents who love my sons
a beautiful day with family & friends

But it's the harder things that I don't naturally give thanks for.

whining children
one brother hurting another
unfulfilled hopes
hard relationships

I can't seem to get the lyrics of the Laura Story song, Blessings, out of my mind recently. What if His blessings come through raindrops? What if they come through tears? What if trials of this life are His mercies in disguise?

I am reminded that God is truly in and over everything. Nothing happens apart from Him--He allows it, He ordains it. Either way, He really is constantly blessing. He really is good...even if I don't "feel" it all the time. His ways are not my ways. I forget that at least once a day. I sit down with my gratitude journal at the end of a hard day sometimes and have to rack my brain to think of what I am thankful for. Ugh!

As Anne Voskamp says, All is grace. Even the ugly can be turned into beautiful by giving thanks. Remembering His faithfulness. Trusting Him to be working all things together for good...always. Thanksgiving comes before the miracle.

So I'm trying to be thankful more for the not so good stuff. The "ugly beautiful." I am seeking freedom there. He is God. I am not. When I try to control all that which does not seem to bring happiness or contentment, or everything that hurts, it just ends up a mess. A cycle of defeat.

A close friend just said to me that the only way hurtful words or actions can truly hurt me (and cause bitterness to root) is if I am not living dead to self. Living the life Christ died to give me. The crucified life. Walking in constant, utter dependence on Him.

Lord, thank you for the hard things today. Teach me how to live completely dependent on you, moment by moment. Trusting you. Believing you. Praising you. May you be glorified...